2003-09-28 - 7:58 p.m.

I'm so cold. So tired. I took the last of my 10 mg anti-depressants today (Paxil), so I get to start taking 20 mg. Hooray. Just what I need...to be addicted to medicated drugs. I guess its better than being addicted to non-medicated drugs right??? Hmm...who knows. Anyway, I am still sitting at 100 lbs. I am hoping to be 99 tomorrow. I didn't get to fast, of course. Today all I had was soup...I was being forced to eat again. I refused a little bit of food and my grandma says "are you on a starvation kick again?" Usually all she does is bitch about how I eat TOO much and she tells my Mom EVERY morning about what I ate & left out while everyone was sleeping. (This is when I'm binging & purging of course.) But yeah...gotta love how they think you eat too much one day, and not enough the next. People are weird.

Anyway, I have nothing more to say. I was thinking about starting this cracker diet thing...Where I'd eat 7 crackers on day 1, 6 crackers on day 2, 5 crackers on day 3...and so on...until I reach the 7th day with only 1 cracker. I don't know if I can do this though, with people accusing me of things all the time, but I'm gonna try. I'm not the greatest for diet plans. I never keep to my world. *sighs* Anyway, I'm gonna make some tea. Later.